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How Parents Can Survive Through the Tough Times
By Nancy Eastman

Many parents ask themselves at some point how they will survive through the latest crisis or extreme behavior problems of their kids. In the middle of daily routines, work, school, kids' activities, and family activities, parents are finding it more difficult to deal with their kids' sudden changes in behavior and attitudes.

Sometimes these behavior problems last for just a short time, but often they continue for a lengthy period. That is when parents begin wondering how they are going to survive through it all.

It is important for parents to remember some simple, but often forgotten, tips for survival through children's and teen's growth and exploration processes. First, I am assuming that you are an average or above average parent who cares deeply about your children and the teens in your family.

Parenting Survival Tip One

Recognize that you are not perfect and might make some mistakes, but that you are always doing the very best that you can. Write out the words "I am not perfect but I always do the very best job that I can!" If the words alone do not help, find a picture or image that is calming and soothing and helps you feel better when you look at it. Then, tape the words onto that picture. Tape this to a mirror or door in your bedroom as a reminder to yourself that you are okay. You will survive. You are doing your very best.

Give yourself permission to not do everything absolutely correct all the time. This is a mental exercise to help you not beat yourself up if you do make a mistake, or perhaps do not act perfectly in a stressful situation. It is simply a matter of recognizing that we are all human, living in a physical body, and nobody acts 100 percent correct all of the time.

Pat yourself on the back for all the hard work you do and the things you have already successfully taught your children and your teens.

Parenting Survival Tip Two

Make sure you allow some breathing space and relaxing time for yourself. You will be able to handle your children better when you have given yourself a little bit of time to unwind. Many parents today forget that they also need to be kind to themselves.

It filters down to the children and teens. If parents are happy and relaxed it will be much easier for them to guide the kids. As a result, the children and teens in the family will also be happier and more content.

Create a schedule and set specific dates and times for your own space. Make arrangements for family members or friends or babysitters to take care of your children and keep an eye on your teens. Then stick to your schedule (unless an emergency comes up) and try very hard to forget about everything for a short time. Have some fun! You will go back to your family refreshed and happier.

This is sometimes a difficult thing for single parents to achieve. However it is even more important for single parents to do this one task. If asking friends and family for help is not possible, find a location that is soothing and calming and take your family there to unwind on a regular basis. Years ago when I was in this situation I took my kids to the water since we lived within driving distance of saltwater beaches. That was where we relaxed and just enjoyed life. Even today, those same beaches are still a favorite location for my kids. So you see, there is always a way.

These are just a few techniques that can change parents' lives for the better. It does not directly address how to deal with youth behavior problems, but it does show how parents can survive through it all. Indirectly it also helps the kids in the family, because happier more content parents will find it easier to find solutions and methods for guiding their kids through all the difficulties that arise. There are many other tips that can also help parents in the day-to-day issues that inevitably come up.

Nancy Eastman is the owner of http://parentinggoldenrule.com/ a website devoted to Golden Rule Parenting (parents teaching their children respect, responsibility, and the Golden Rule). Nancy is a mother/grandmother with many years of experience dealing with difficult, stressful situations and years of experience assisting her children grow into mature responsible adults. Resources are being added to the website to assist parents with the difficult task of helping their children walk through today's world. An ebook will be coming in the near future on the subject of Golden Rule Parenting. Check out the free resources currently on the website! There are old-time stories, games, crafts, poems, puzzles, articles, and other resources to help parents find creative ways to help their children grow.